We rented “Hall Pass” on PPV this weekend.
Okay, I tried to watch it Sunday morning. Actually, I clicked the little button on the remote control because that was all the work I was capable of doing Sunday morning. I had every intention of watching it as I vegged and wound down to go to sleep. But, again, it was morning. A morning when I was so tired that I was in pain from it. Yeah, that’s another story for another day.
So I rent the movie. And the beginning was really cute and I could see our lives in it–lives as parents and a couple who has been married for over a decade. And then I woke up. And it was noon. And John explained that I didn’t get more than 5 minutes into the movie before going into a coma induced by too much work.
The kids are asleep, pizza reheated, I have yet to be called into work, and we are going to watch this movie, dammit. And I laughed at the cheap humor in it. It didn’t require any extra IQ points or a college degree to get it. Score! Because sometimes you just do not want to think. And then the credits rolled, the flick was over, and I stopped to think of the concept behind the movie.
The Hall Pass. A week off from marriage to do whatever it is one would like to do but cannot within a marriage. A vacation from married life. Is this ingenious or ridonkulous?
Would I ever, ever consider allowing my husband to do this? The idea is ridiculous because, well, my husband is a grown man and I don’t allow him to do anything simply because he has free will. He can come and go as he chooses. Does he have any desire to stray? Maybe. Hell, I don’t know. Does he notice other women? Most likely, simply because he isn’t dead. I don’t bother myself with it. I trust him. And I trust that if he was unhappy enough that he needed a “break” from marriage, he would just leave. This movie makes it sound as if marriage is a life sentence instead of a commitment to one another. I take vacations from work (though admittedly very rarely). To insinuate that one needs a break from marriage is to say that marriage ranks among the most back-breaking of chores. And you know what? If that is what a marriage is, then there shouldn’t be a marriage there in the first place.
This all brings up the line between commitment and obligation. I am obligated to follow the rules of society. I am obligated to my employer. I am obligated to my creditors. My marriage is more of an animal of commitment in that I choose to live my life with my husband. And because I do, fidelity is something that comes naturally. I don’t need a break from it. I wanted this life. I can assume the same from my husband and if I am incorrect in that assumption, then he can have a break. A permanent break. He can walk right out that door.